SNAP SHOT
Instant Messaging WHILE in the Workplace
Episode 10: THAT HIGH SCHOOL GIRL’S BEST FRIEND
Uncensored. NOW SOMEWHAT Unscripted. And unsolicited. Just when you think nothing will come out when you engage a conversation inside the realm of cyberspace, TADAH! You can see what you typed in this page!
Cheap plug: My YM is stacey_the_evil_chipmunk (if you want your thoughts to be hacked).
| The Situation: |
| This was hours after I posted the episode THAT HIGH SCHOOL GIRL in my blogsite. Then her best friend reads it. YARE!!! Read on. |
Stapler Girl’s BFF: bwahahaha!! lagot ka!!
As one they are vulnerable, but when combined they are scary. That’s why if we mess with one of them… you mess with both of them.
I actually learned this the hard way, and I think I’m going to learn this again.
I don’t want to learn this again…
The Sydman: Pero tinago ko pangalan niya!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Siya lang naman ang nilagyan mo ng staple wire sa buhok noh!
Yup. What I did when I was in second year high school was in fact… legendary!
Na-adik na ako sa How I Met Your Mother…
The Sydman: Teka, ano pala sayad non?
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Walang sayad yun! Malakas lang ang imagination.
The Sydman: Pero AKO!?!?! PINAGSESELOSAN AKO!?!?! TAE!!! AS IF NAMAN NAGING KAME!!!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Eh kasi nanligaw ka di ba? Eh ‘di lalo na kung naging kau dati!
The Sydman: (pissed) NANLIGAW DIN NAMAN SI PAJARO SA KANYA!!! PINAGSESELOSAN NIYA BA YON!?!?! ISIPIN KO…
(thinks then blurts) HINDEEEEEHHH!!!!!!
During high school, people rank your importance in life with a kind of caste system. There are the jocks or cheerleaders… the somewhat normal guys… the geeks… mean grade 5 students… not-so-fluent geeky Koreans… and algae.
Pajaro was a little higher than the algae… or was he?
Stapler Girl’s BFF: (shocked) ‘Di ko alam yun! Isusumbong kita!! At noong nanghihingi ka ng Pringles, malayo kami sa asawa niya…
The Sydman: AHA! Ikaw pala may kasalanan e! Baka narinig! Kaya pala ako nadamay!
He might be Green 2 tapos meron siyang SONIC EAR! Wait… or was that Blue 3…
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Kasalanan mo mukha mo!!! tae you!!!
The Sydman: Isang beses lang niya ako binigyan at matagal na yon!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Eh siyempre kailangan malaman ng asawa niya kung sino naging past niya noh!
The Sydman: PAST!?!?! AKO!!!!?!?!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Parang ganun... past na rin yun!
The Sydman: Ginagatungan mo yata e!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Hindi noh!
The Sydman: Oo, baka sinasabi mo, “mas gwapo si Syd kesa sayo”! Wag ganon okay... wag ganon!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: TUNGAK!! KAHIT KELAN DI KO SINABING GWAPO KA!!
The Sydman: You must have an eye problem… Pero seryoso ha, noong nagkita kami, sabi ko sa kanya naging GF kita nung high school tapos ‘pag may nagtanong, ako nakipag-break dahil magko-concentrate ako sa studies! Pumayag… haha!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: hahaha! asa!
The Sydman: Nangyare yon! Tanong mo pa sa kanya! Hindi ako nananaginip! Pero lumilipad kami non e... atsaka may gagambang nagsasalita sa likod ko…
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Ah, panaginip nga yun.
The Sydman: Pero mabalik tayo, ano nga ba nangyari kung bakit galit na galit nga sa akin yun? Tama ba hinala ko, tuwing nag-aaway sila pinapakita niya picture ko kaya sobra ang galet sakin non?
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Taena mo ah, baka nagka-cartwheel ka na dyan!
The Sydman: HINDI NO!
Yes I was. Ladadee… ladadeeeeee…
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Nagtanong ka pa! Slow! Hay nako! Ewan ko sayo! ‘Pag umuwi na lang siya, ingatan mo buhay mo!
The Sydman: Pwes, bahala na siya kung anong gawin niya sa akin. Sampalin man niya ako ng dollars tapos akin na lang later... or bigyan niya ako ng bagong sapatos o kaya isang Detroit Red Wings na jersey... tapos Green na Pringles!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Asus!! Pringles ka pa dyan ah!
The Sydman: E YUN YUNG ULTIMATE BALIKBAYAN GIFT E!!!!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Sure, sure makakarating! Eh nga pala... seryoso ka ba talaga nun?
Previously, I stated the fact that I was sooooo freakishly TSOPE that caused my end.
The Sydman: Oo noong high school. Nung college medyo ‘di ko na nakakausap. Tapos nawala na lang bigla.
Stapler Girl’s BFF: At katapat niya lang eh Archie Comics?
The Sydman: Atsaka regarding the Archie com...
(thinks) UBOD NA MANLY NA DC COMICS, pampalakas lang ng loob yun sa akin.
Ano ba yung Archie Comics? Never encountered it…
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Ah… kaya pala binigyan mo siya ng rose nung prom… hahaha..
The Sydman: Sobrang seryoso.
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Sobra? Kaya pala hinde niya nahalata e! BWAHAHAHAHA!
Younger self… YOU ARE SUCH A JACKASSSSSSSSSSS!!
Ehem.
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Pero nabanggit niya saken yung mga moments na yun.
The Sydman: Miski man ako pag niligawan ko sarili ko hindi ko rin ‘to papansinin e!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Haha! Basted agad? Wawa ka naman… sayang talaga!
The Sydman: Dahil pwede?
Stapler Girl’s BFF: OO noh!!
I closed my eyes. All of a sudden, I was on a beach. There were women and somewhat gay men forming a line in the seashore waiting for a go signal. There was one particular guy dressed in a Hawaiian shirt asking me if he should press the play button on the boom box. I said yes…
and the best damn Pinoy beach dance scene follows.
The Sydman: ISI-SAVE KO TOH!!!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: ulul!!
The Sydman: TAPOS ILALAGAY KO SA MULTIPLY KO!!!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Wow! Parang nabasa ko na yan? Ano yan dejavu?!
The Sydman: Wala ba talagang siyang naging BF bukod doon?
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Wala. First and last yung asawa niya.
At this point, my happy-fun-time-moment crashed and burn. Must… not… strangle… myself… for… being… disgustingly… torpe… back… then…
Oh look... extension cords!
The Sydman: Whoa... okay, dapat pagselosan nga ako. Pero first and last!?!? Sigurado ka?
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Oo siyempre alam ko yun, best friend ko yun eh!
The Sydman: A basta, pag umuwi yun, sabihan mo ako. Para naman may panahon ako para magtago!
Stapler Girl’s BFF: Biglaan umuuwi un eh… mga one week before. Hinde ka ba mahilig sa surprise?!
I don’t really, really like surprises, especially if it involves my balls, flush out from my ears. I’m sure she would be cool with this. After all she is such a caring person and despite her physical strength SHE WILL NOT USE THESE ABILITIES FOR EVIL!!!!
Ehem.
Let this be a moment of Zen: Cobie Smulders is legendary.
END
